Hey moonbabes, Merhipsy here! So stoked to be coming to you again with yet another radical astral report from none other than the Galactic Goddess herself, Remy Ramirez. Gorgeouses, I’m gonna get real with you. With a Super Moon in Gemini, Mercury in Retrograde yet again (like when is it not, tho?), and a new moon in generous yet secretive Sagittarius…we are in for a doozy. Read below to find out how you can hold on through this cosmic rodeo

SAGITTARIUS

Hey hey, centaurs! Your birthday month kicks off with some wonky shit from the stars (*raises fist at sky*).  The full moon in Gemini on the 3^rd happens on the same day that Mercury retrogrades (woof), and also squares murky, confusing Neptune. This will go down in your house of partnerships, so if you’re coupled up, expect some bummer miscommunications/misunderstandings aaaand… potential lying and deception. NOT CHILL. If you get the feeling that your boo is pumping you full of b.s., trust that intuition, bb, and make decisions accordingly. If you’re single, this might have more to do with business partners, or f**kbois disguised as legit applicants—just say no! And don’t schedule any important meetings on this day for sure. The upside is that Jupiter will be trining Neptune the day before, relaying good fortune, good will, and creativity—so let’s put our energy and attention there on the 3rd, shall we? It just might be enough to overpower the cosmic adversity. On the 18^th, a new moon will lay some groundwork in your sign, Fire Babe, but it also comes with challenges. For one, Mercury will be retrograding, also in Sagittarius. This may give you an upbeat, fun respite from Merc’s retro-motion, but it might also go the opposite direction, amplifying issues around college/learning, travel (especially overseas), and communication. It’s also Saturn’s last day in Sagittarius—which is awesome—but as a parting gift, he’ll bring on some crisis energy in order to create the big shift into Capricorn. Yay. Don’t despair, though, Sag. One cool thing about this new moon is that it will open a framework for you to revisit issues from your past in order to heal them. True, that’s not, like, a party or anything—but what you clear on this new moon will set you up for some major Centaur ass-kicking later down the road, so get in there and handle it like a champ, Sag.

CAPRICORN

Hi Cap! A full moon in Gemini on the 3^rd is syncing up with Mercury retrograde and squaring Neptune in Pisces—so like, it’s kinda effed. This is going down in your 8^th house of sex and personal transformation. Crazy combo! Be on the lookout for deluding yourself. The 8^th house wants you to confront your shadow side, learn from those places where you fall short of being a spiritual badass, and then grow into a better version of yourself. Gemini, when afflicted, brings betrayal and lies, as does will-not-be-held-accountable Neptune. Look at yourself honestly, and if you see a lack of integrity—now’s the time to step up and make changes. This also applies to your sex life; if you’re deluding yourself about someone you’re sleeping with (or deluding them), that’s about to come to a head. The good news is that Neptune will trine Jupiter on the 2^nd, bringing good fortune and stability to this moon. It’s a powerful aspect, but whether it’s powerful enough to rescue us from that gnarly square… we’ll soon find out. On the 18^th, a new moon in Sagittarius will coincide with Mercury retrograde, and also with Saturn’s last day in Sagittarius before it heads over into your neck of the woods—a shift that can bring on a crisis. Because the moon is hitting up your house of wealth and income, you might see delays and miscommunications in this area—especially if you’ve invested in something overseas, or if you make money teaching, writing, or through travel. On the other hand, this house might also ask you to look at your personal value system or sense of self-worth. Sagittarius energy is about exploring fearlessly. What ways do you keep yourself small? Where in your life do you feel like you aren’t good enough for huge success? These big questions might play a role in December’s new moon, so rather than put it off till the next time the Cosmos ask you to take a look, do it now, do it openheartedly. It’s the ultimate Boss Bitch move.

AQUARIUS

Sup Aquarius! A full moon in your Air Sister, Gem, goes down on the 3^rd, the same day that Mercury retrogrades (face palm emoji). PLUS, it makes a v not chill square to nebulous Neptune. This is landing in your house of travel and mental expansion. If you have travel plans or are trying to finalize them, you could def run into roadblocks like miscommunications and delays. If you’ve been working on elevating your mind in some way: grad school, spiritual expansion, etc., be on the lookout for being misled, deceived, or even stolen from (aka just say no to cults!). That’s the shit news, but the good news is that this full moon falls within 24 hours of a trine between Neptune and Jupiter—a super optimistic aspect that brings on the blessings and hopefully overrides the mischief this moon/Mercury combo is up to, so get those positive affirmations goin’ in a real way, bb. Our new moon in Sagittarius on the 18^th doesn’t have a tough square, but it’s not all roses either. Because it’s linking up with this Mercury retrograde in Sagittarius *and* with Saturn’s last day in Sagittarius (a moment of comic crisis for the ‘ole planet), the vibes are unstable at best. This is going down in your house of communication. Be ultra careful with memos you send out at work, gossiping, having tough talks with loved ones—all areas of communication will be affected by this energy. On the other hand, you might find that you’re asked to have a conversation about something from your past that has kept you from making a big leap forward in your life (think childhood trauma, exes who made you swear off the opposite sex, etc.). Should that be the case, it’s a blessing, girlfriend. These things appear so we can untangle the knot and make space for bigger and better blessings. Air five for that.

PISCES

Hey there, Fish Babes. You kick December off with a bit of a rough patch. The full moon in Gemini on the 3rd links up with everyone’s favorite: Mercury retrograde! (Slow clap.) AND, it’s square Neptune in Pisces (yup, that’s you). This is going down in your house of career and professional success. Woof. Be on the lookout for crossed wires at work, betrayal, or deception. Co-workers who you get a weird vibe about—there’s probably a reason for that, and that reason may well come to a head on or around the 3^rd. The saving grace is that on the 2^nd, Jupiter sends a friendly trine beam over to Neptune, which could totes dismantle the up-to-no-good-edness the moon’s got goin’ on. So light a candle, say a prayer, dress up your altar—whatever ya gotta do to get those good vibes flowin’. On the 18^th, a new moon in Sagittarius keeps it comin’ with the cosmic drama. Not only is it lined up with Mercury retrograde (also in Sag), but it falls on Saturn’s last day in Sagittarius, which has a bit of a meltdown vibe. So yeah, fun stuff. This is going down in your house of home. If you’re moving, looking to move, dealing with roommates, remodeling—expect issues in a real way (miscommunications, arguments, etc.), and put the whole thing off till January if you can. Sagittarius is a sign of exploration and expansion, so if you’ve created blocks in your life preventing you from having the kind of dream living situation you really want, the new moon is gonna be all up in your biz about it. The house of home is one of the metaphorical houses, so often “home” means you—your personal foundations. Don’t be surprised if this moon asks you to look at how grounded and stable you are—do you believe in yourself? Are you trustworthy? Do take care of your mental and emotional wellbeing so that you don’t have breakdowns every time you turn on the news? If anything is blocking you here—especially if that thing originated in your past—it may well come up so that you can process it and move on. Deep breaths, Pisces. It’s tough love, but love just the same.

ARIES

Hey there, Ram Mamas! The Cosmos aren’t goin’ easy on December, so let’s get down to business. The month starts off with a full moon in Gemini on the 3^rd, which squares sneaky, dishonest Neptune—all at the same time that Mercury goes into retrograde. So that’s fun. This is happening in your house of friends and social circles, so on top of some srs miscommunication potential, you could also see deception, lying, or stealing from friends/peeps in your circle. NOT INTO IT. I will say that our one Hail Mary is a trine between Jupiter and Neptune on the 2^nd, which will send stabilizing, good fortune vibes into the ether, and hopefully overrule these shittier star aspects. I wish I could say we see a big shift with the new moon in Sagittarius on the 18^th, but it’s tangled up in some tough aspects, too; one being that Mercury retrograde will also be going down in Sagittarius, sending the moon discord and miscommunication messages. Not just that, but Saturn, who’s kind of a dick anyway, will end his transit through Sagittarius on the 18^th, and basically have a meltdown as a result (homeboy hates change). This will be affecting your house of children, creativity, and pleasure. If you have or care for children, you might come up against some breakdowns—especially in communication with/about them; creative projects you’re working on could see some serious roadblocks; and if you have any leisure plans on the books, feel free to push those out till the Cosmos take a chill (preferably after the 22^nd). A note: retrogrades often ask us to revisit issues from our past; because this house deals with children, issues from your own childhood might come up, asking to be tended to, processed, and healed. Not exactly a party popper situation, but a great way to cleanse before you head into 2018, Aries.

TAURUS

Hey Bull Babes, get ready for a rocky start to the month! On December 3^rd, a full moon in Gemini will square Neptune in Pisces, bringing out its darkest aspects (deception, betrayal, and theft among them). Not just that, but Mercury goes retrograde on the same day, so it’s actually the literal worst. This is all happening in your house of secrets, the subconscious/spirituality, and shadow energy. You may very well experience dishonesty from others, but the real crux of this house is in learning to trust yourself. You might be asked to confront something within yourself that you’ve been hiding from: lies you tell yourself, times you turn away from your deepest needs, or ways that you steal your own joy. Though this one could really suck from an outside perspective, its power is in healing pathological behavior you inflict on yourself. (We hate this, but we need this, Taurus). To help ease the intensity, Jupiter will send a super benevolent and stabilizing trine over to Neptune on the 2^nd. Take the good with the shitty on this one; its ultimate goal is to make you feel more comfortable in your own skin, and that’s priceless, babe. In related news, the 18^th is bringing on some Sagittarius new moon drama all its own, as it links up with Mercury retrograde (also in Sag), and Saturn, whose last day in Sag falls on the same day, causing the curmudgeonly planet to kinda lose it. For you specifically, this will affect your house of work and service. Sagittarius is about expanding—it’s also about being super tactless and just telling it like it is. Not dishonorable per se, but also not the greatest idea in a work environment. Be aware that your “expanding” at work doesn’t involve stepping on anyone’s toes, and that your diplomacy filter is set to “on” in all work convos. Another way this house manifests is through service, which can translate to relationships in which we give too much of ourselves without getting in return. If you’re giving that energy a place to live or have in the past (bc retrograde), it’s time to revisit that dynamic and heal it. I know, I know, sob emojis, but the truth is that it’s really good medicine in the long run, so bring you’re A-game, bb.

GEMINI

Hey Twin Star! You’re at the center of some srs cosmic upheaval this month, so let’s get to it. On the 3^rd, a full moon in your very own esteemed sign will square Neptune in Pisces, extracting its darkest capabilities: deception, betrayal, and theft. Not just that, but Mercury—your planetary ruler—goes into retrograde on the same day. The power of Gemini is in communication and verbal expression, but with all this stellar riff raff going on, you may run into miscommunication, manipulation, or verbal deception. Woof.  Be super aware of your words around this time, put off important conversations, and def don’t schedule any meetings. There is a bright side: on the 2^nd, Jupiter will trine Neptune, sending chill, happy, good fortune vibes that (fingers crossed) undermine the tougher aspects of this full moon. Speaking of tough aspects, the new moon in Sagittarius on the 18th is only slightly more fun than the full moon. Because it’s linked up with Mercury retrograde in Sagittarius, and falls on Saturn’s last day in Sagittarius (a day of crisis for the ruler of discipline), shit can get pretty wack. This will be affecting your house of partnerships—marriages, business partners, boo thangs, etc. Be on the lookout for miscommunications, arguments, and/or breakdowns of various kinds with the people you team up with. Because this is a retrograde period, exes are also in the mix. Yay. I know it all sounds about as fun as an acetone facial, but the goal here is to teach you how to communicate effectively in one-on-one situations. So come correct, Gem; speak from the heart, and listen from the heart, too. It’s a pretty badass combo.

CANCER

Hi Crab Babes! This month gets off to a testy start for sure. The December 3^rd Gemini full moon squares deceptive Neptune in Pisces on the same day that Mercury stations retrograde—just a whole lotta no thanks. This will all go down in your house of wealth and possessions. Womp womp. Your earned income could be at risk right now, and you should def keep an eye out for valuables being stolen. This house also oversees your personal value system, so if there are any areas where you’re not coming correct—lying, manipulation, any kind of deception at all, even to yourself—it’s about to bite you in the ass. Gemini is a sign of verbal expression, so really pay attention to what people say to you around this day, and what you say to other people. Keep it honest, keep that gut instinct in tact, and keep a lock on all your shit. There is good news though—on the 2^nd, a beam of good vibes in the form of a Jupiter/Neptune trine will fill the stars with optimism, good fortune, and stability, and that could be enough to balance out the descent into bummer town going down on the 3^rd. On the 18^th, a new moon in Sagittarius is also dishin’ it. Here’s what’s up: because Mercury is also retrograde in Sagittarius, the two are linking up, bringing on miscommunications and delays (especially in travel). But there’s more! Grumpy Saturn will also be in its final day of a Sagittarius transit on the 18^th—making it super angry and annoyed. This will link crisis energy to the new moon, which will light up your house of sex and transformation. Sorry bb, but that’s pretty intense. If you’re sleeping with anyone, be on the lookout for arguments and big feels. This house is also about personal evolution—your ability to grow and improve as a human. Turns out that doesn’t usually happen without some adversity, so this moon may bring trials to catalyze that development and push you into the next level. YAY (sarcastic yay, but also… actual yay). Another note: Retrogrades can be excellent tools in putting our attention on issues from our pasts that weren’t resolved so that we can finally let them go. If you’re holding on to painful sexual memories—anything from assault to unrequited love—those might take center stage around this moon so that you can rage, grieve, accept, say goodbye, and move on to your greatest good. Not all fun and games, but super powerful stuff.

LEO

Hey ya, Lions! December 3^rd brings a Gemini full moon with major drama, namely a square with manipulative Neptune in Pisces on the same day that Gemini’s ruler—Mercury—goes retrograde. Talk about a double whammy. This is happening in your house of communication, which is the realm that Gem oversees. There’s a vry real chance that a manipulative or dishonest force could show up and try to pump you full of b.s. (friends, lovers, co-workers—your own mind, even). You’re going to need to get that hyper-vigilance going; if anything feels off to you, if anyone’s vibe doesn’t meet your integrity standards—get tf outta there, Leo, and don’t buy into it, whatever they’re selling. On the flip, a super awesome trine between Jupiter and Neptune will light up the sky on the 2^nd, sending powerful, positive energy, capable of stabilizing any shit situation that may come along on the 3^rd, so hell yeah for that. The 18^th’s new moon in Sagittarius is coming with its own set of sad face emojis. It’ll be linked up to two rough aspects: 1. Mercury retrograde, also in Sagittarius, and 2. Saturn’s last day in Sagittarius before moving into Capricorn (a note here: Saturn hates change, so this will bring on the crisis vibes). All this will be affecting your house of travel and mental expansion. If you have travel plans around the 18^th, bring a good book and charge your laptop; delays are comin’ atcha. Likewise, if you have any plans for grad school/college (applications, etc.) or are involved in writing or publishing in some way, major hold ups in those arenas could very much be a thing. Rather than throw a fit, Leo, just chill out till after the 22^nd, when Mercury stations direct and the Cosmos start to relax. If you absolutely have to forge ahead in these areas, be extra careful to cross your t’s, dot your i’s, and wrap everything up in mega-positive affirmations.

VIRGO

Oh hi, Virgo. We get this month rolling with a full moon in Gemini on the 3^rd, squaring Neptune and synching up with the launch of Mercury retrograde. Woof. This is lighting up your house of home and internal frameworks. If you have any changes going on with your physical living situation—new roommates, remodeling, moving to a new spot—be super vigilant about people straight up lying to you, trying to steal your shit, or just generally causing delays and miscommunications (pro tip: those “people” could also be you, bb—such is the power of delusion). If you can put plans off till the 10^th, you’d have an easier time for sure, and even more so after the 22nd. This house can also turn the focus onto you rather than your external circumstance, and when that happens, introspection is required. Should that be the case, you may find that this moon is asking you to look at how you talk to yourself—your internal dialogue. Neptune’s shadow is about despair, delusion, and dishonesty. Do you lie to yourself? Do you worry to the point of hopelessness? Because Mercury rules both Gemini and Virgo, and is closely associated with worry, you may find yourself feeling supes anxious around this moon. Take a deep breath, babe, and get that lavender bath going—learning to take care of yourself in tense times is a major life hack. On the 2^nd, Jupiter sends a beautiful, powerful trine to Neptune, which might help mitigate the hard stuff. So it’s not all shit news, Virgo, and if it is, that’s what those thousands of YouTube meditations are for. On the 18^th, a new moon in Sagittarius isn’t letting up either. It will be in cahoots with the Sagittarius Mercury retrograde AND with Saturn’s crisis as it leaves Sagittarius and moves into Capricorn. All that cosmic craziness will be going down in your house of career and personal success. UGH. Sagittarius wants us to go big, explore, unchain ourselves from the mundane and go see the world. If that resonates with how you think of your career to date, this could especially powerful for you. Sagittarius energy will be pushing you to expand somehow in your career—maybe through a promotion that allows more freedom, or by ditching that cubicle life and going freelance to purse what you actually love. Only problem is that with these cosmic hang-ups, you could see big delays in making it happen around the new moon. If you can put things off till the 22^nd, all the better. If not, just remember that sometimes the Universe tests us to see if what we say we want is actually what we want. So press on, Virgo. You got this.

LIBRA

Hey Air Mamas! On the 3^rd, a full moon in Gemini will square nebulous Neptune on the same day that Mercury retrogrades—so. much. ugh. This is going on in your house of children, creativity, and pleasure. If you have children or take care of children, there might be some upsets in your relationship to them. A square with Neptune will draw out dishonesty, betrayal, or even theft (yay…). On the other hand, this might end up having more to do with any creative projects you’re working on, or vacays you have on the books around this date, so be on the lookout for bummer behaviors and goings-on in those arenas, too. With Mercury retrograde in the mix, it could come down to some majorly crossed wires and miscommunications, but if you go into situations knowing that, you can make sure to dot your i’s and cross your t’s along the way, which could def help smooth things out.  There is one thing to be stoked on with this moon: on the 2^nd, Jupiter will send Neptune a magical trine beam full of good energy, happy feels, and successes, and that may well offset the effects of the full moon. (COME THROUGH, JUPITER TRINE).  On the 18^th, a new moon in Sagittarius will also be cranking out some womp womp. Mostly because it’s influenced by a Sagittarius Mercury retrograde, but also because it’s also coinciding with Saturn’s last day in Sagittarius before transiting into Capricorn—and that means cosmic meltdown. This will be affecting your house of friends and social circles, especially if some of those friends are either literally from overseas or if they are new to your world. Expect communication breakdowns, arguments, hurt feelings, etc. That’s the bad news. The good news is that you just read this, so you can see the dilemma coming and keep your cool when it does. Sometimes a little foresight is all that’s needed in these situations, and that, paired with your killer diplomacy skills, may be the magical recipe in creating blessings from the drama.

SCORPIO

Hey hey, Scorp. Since you’re probably the only sign that can take the shit news of December’s full moon, let’s dive right in: it lands in Gemini on the 3^rd, and makes a gnarly square to Neptune, drawing out all its fun shadow stuff—ya know: deception, betrayal, theft. Not just that, but Mercury retrogrades on the exact same day. Cosmos testing our patience like whoa. This is going down in your house of work and service, so it applies to work (obvs) but also anywhere you volunteer or give of yourself (sometimes imbalanced relationships where one person gives more than the other can fall into this house). Be on the lookout for a whole range of possibilities in these life arenas, from minor misunderstandings, to people saying one thing and doing another, to legit backstabbing. Before you go hiding in a closet for a week though, there is a saving grace here: on the 2^nd, Jupiter will trine Neptune, sending a srs wave of blessings and benevolence into the ether, and hopefully overpowering these dark-side-of-the-moon vibes the 3^rd are bringing. Speaking of, the new moon in Sagittarius on the 18^th isn’t going much easier on us. It’s synching up with Mercury retrograde in Sagittarius *and* Saturn’s last day in Sagittarius before swooping into Cap (these last day transits spell “drama” in astro-speak). All this will be affecting your house of secrets, shadow energy, and spirituality (especially witchy shit!). Sagittarius wants us to explore, go big, be fearless, and yet this house warns of heartbreak, so you might see issues around unrequited love on this day, of finding out someone’s just not that into you. A secret could also be revealed that upsets you, or creates major delays in your plans. Because of the retrograde energy asking us to look at our pasts, these might be people or secrets from times gone by. As painful as those things can be, working with retrograde energy can be super healing as we create closure around our histories, and fortify our hearts so we can move on and kick ass in the next chapter. So go bravely, Scorp; it’s what you’re a pro at, and it’s what’s needed from you this month.

 

Not the best month for you? Don’t worry, babe. With this horo-scoop in your back pocket, you can STILL make the most of this month! Let us know in the comments below how you plan to slay this month

 

 

 

ABOUT THE AUTHOR
Remy Ramirez loves stars, shoes, the ‘80s, superfluous thrift store purchases, and two-stepping through rundown honky tonks. She is the executive editor of The FIXX magazine, and you can find her musings in Nylon, Bust, Nasty Galaxy, and strewn on post-its around her bedroom. She lives in Sedona, Arizona among the prickly pear and cicadas.